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Arthur Shilov
Arthur Shilov

Mature Sex Suprise

I'm 54. Elly is 52. When we first got together, I thought sex was as static as eye color. I had no idea how it could evolve and mature. We're not two horny college kids humping our brains out on a single mattress to Dylan's "Blonde on Blonde" LP. We still do it to music -- in addition to the Stones, there are Springsteen and Indigo Girls CDs stacked up on our boom box -- but now we're on a king-size bed surrounded by scented candles, and the action has mellowed. I forget who said it, but it's true: Older sex is less like the Fourth of July, more like Thanksgiving. In our case, it's a feast with the occasional bone in the stuffing -- the bones being our enduring difference in desired frequency.

mature sex suprise

Elly and I met in college. We were introduced by a mutual friend at a screening of an obscure movie, "Lilith," with Warren Beatty, Jean Seberg, Peter Fonda and Gene Hackman, about a therapist who falls in love with a patient. (Every now and then when we notice it's on TV, we try to catch it.) Elly was a freshman, all of 18. I was an "older man," a 20-year-old junior. We have kids those ages now, and it amazes us how immature they seem. We ask each other if we were that clueless, and suppose we were. It never occurred to us when we were that age that life is long, and that we could grow and change together -- as individuals and partners in marriage and in a sexual relationship.

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It was brains I was after. I had no interest in looks, popular fame or money. From the age of 13 or so it was clear to me that I needed a mature, sophisticated lover, a writer, artist, journalist or politico. I daydreamed coups de foudre, epiphanic meetings with the writers whose books I was reading and encounters with nameless, imaginary artists and philosophers. No businessmen, comedians or rock stars. I wanted wisdom and sexual finesse. I had no upper age limit, although in those days the oldest man in my life was in his fifties. My lower limit was quite specific: no one under thirty. My interest simply died when someone revealed himself to be 28 or 29.

Males and females look different from each other, and these sexual dimorphisms are the result, largely, of sex differences in the expression of certain genes. Typically, scientists have studied sexual dimorphism in sexually mature adult animals, as this is the lifestage where differences are most apparent. However, many sex-specific phenotypes arise from sex-biased development, so sex-biased gene expression should be expected to begin during development. Recent research from GEE reveals complex patterns of sex- and stage-dependent gene expression, resulting from differing evolutionary pressures on difference sexes. In fact, sex-biased gene expression is actually most evident during early development.

Do I need to get him some kind of counseling, or will this get better as he gets older and matures? I'm angry that his father didn't use his head before choosing his actions, and now I'm the one being punished for it. -- TOO MUCH FOR MY SON

Jungkook is a lot of things, but mature is not one of them. He doesn't want to grow up and is adamant about it until he meets you. A single mother that he can't seem to stop thinking about. It's then when Jungkook battles his fear of growing up as he fights to stay in your life and get closer to your son. 041b061a72


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